Wednesday, March 31, 2004


Damn You Cash-less Society

Went to the store for a fix of sunflower seeds. Cost: $.89. I hand the nice NPR listening cashier my debit card--no dice. $5 minimum for debit purchases.

So, I spend the next 5 minutes digging through my car looking for 89 cents worth of change. I finally found it, and now I am enjoying the sweet sodium filled goodness of David's best.

On to slightly weightier issues...

Okay people, what can we do to get Northern Alliance Radio on a national platform? It could still hold it's current local position in Minnesota, but the nation needs them too.

Salem, please offer these guys a night-time show. David Lawrence sucks and doesn't even fit your format. NARN following Hewitt is a winning combination. Think about it.

Luke Duke 3/31/2004 05:45:00 PM #

Air America phrase of the day: "Very open-minded liberal"--So open that things just seem to fly in and fly out.

Luke Duke 3/31/2004 03:27:00 PM #

Good News about Mike Whicker's "A Book for Every Soldier" campaign:

Because of the generosity of Invitation to Valhalla readers, the Evansville Public Library and Borders Bookstore, $3400.00 worth of new books left March 29th and are on their way to our fighting men and women in Iraq. This first shipment is just one of many we hope to make to our soldiers deployed in areas deemed in harm's way.

My check is in the the IRS. But once I get paid this week I will be sending $15 bucks Mike's way. I hope some of you plan to do the same, if for nothing else than the possibility of getting Hugh Hewitt's soon to be best-selling new book in to the hands of our brave soldiers over-seas.

Luke Duke 3/31/2004 03:12:00 PM #

Air America is more awful than previously expected. I could make a fortune consulting these people. Here are some freebies:

-Learn radio before you go on air

-There is such a thing as too many chefs in the kitchen.

-Don't give specific times (i.e. 3:30) when you are on in more than one time zone. Use generic times like "17 after."

-Pick hosts who don't sound like they're broadcasting from Marlboro Country.

-Fix the ghastly production value.

-The callers, not the hosts, should be the only one's allowed to engage in Illuminatti talk.

-It turns people off when you call half the country "inbred".

-Stop the years-old "Cheney is in an un-disclosed location" "joke."

-Saying that the cities you are broadcasting in are the only ones that really matter is a horrible plan if you expect to expand.

Luke Duke 3/31/2004 12:32:00 PM #

Another Garofalo quote(from NY Times):

It's not like we're here to say we're going to be as nasty as right-wingers," Ms. Garofalo said in an interview. "On the left, traditionally, you've got a nicer type of person. You've got a person who is more willing to engage in conversations that have context and nuance, who tend to have more educable minds."

But then during their show "practice":

Sedar on Ari Fleischer: "Is he not shoveling coal in hell now?"

Garofalo on Karl Rove: pursuing "the elusive 18-25 Klan demo"

Sedar on the media: "Really, most reporters are whores."

Luke Duke 3/31/2004 12:13:00 PM #

Tuesday, March 30, 2004


The Elder wraps himslef in a flag and hides behind Jesus. Brilliant work!

Luke Duke 3/30/2004 06:59:00 PM #

Okay, I've got a couple quick questions:

1. Why is there a picture of Dennis Prager on the web page for Penn and Teller's new TV show?

2. How is this Hulk Hogans Daughter? Page Six is reporting her plans to be the next Britney Spears.

Luke Duke 3/30/2004 02:34:00 PM #

Monday, March 29, 2004


First things first; this is smut.

Second things second; It's a Monday and I'm tired. Good-night.

Luke Duke 3/29/2004 05:42:00 PM #

Friday, March 26, 2004


There is only one word that sums up the resurfacing of the Bind Torture Kill Strangler, and that word is "spooky." And talk about an intimidating name. Bind Torture Kill--No need to ask what his MO was.

I think this case actually has Wichita police, and the public in general excited. Not only do they have the chance to serve justice to a killer who has thus far eluded it, but they get to do it C.S.I. style with all the new toys that weren't available to them at the time of the crimes. Plus, everybody likes a good mystery. All I can say is that I hope justice is served before there are any more victims, and with all the clues this guy is leaving, I hope it's not a wild-goose chase or a setup.

Luke Duke 3/26/2004 01:23:00 PM #

Thursday, March 25, 2004


Puzzlestud Book Review

This time the book is Digital Fortress by Dan Brown.

Best known for his controversial best-seller The DaVinci Code, Dan Brown is great at mixing fact with fiction in an absolutely captivating way. In Digital Fortress, Brown tells a story of cryptographers racing to save the capability of "big brother" to break complex codes. True of all Dan Brown's novels, the book is almost impossible to put down.

Digital Fortress is a book that very easily could have been ruined by politics. Brown does a very impressive job of representing both sides of the coin, one side being national security, the other being the right to privacy. More believable then some of Brown's other novels, such as Angels & Demons, Digital Fortress is a book where the bad guys aren't always evil, and the good guys aren't always pure, and in the end of the battle, the war is still ongoing.

Luke Duke 3/25/2004 03:47:00 PM #

Wednesday, March 24, 2004


Hugh Hewitt made some great observations on what he calls the "Al Franken Experiment" in his latest article.

If there is one thing I know it is radio. I've only been in radio since I was 17, but I've moved up in the food-chain and made a name for myself pretty quick.

I believe Al Franken will, after a brief period of curiosity listenership, fall flat on his face. There are a few reasons why I believe this.

First of all, he's a comedian. Good if you want a wacky morning show an a rock station, bad for a political commentator. When it comes to politics, the majority of the listening public will still want Rush Limbaugh, they will still want Hannity, Hewitt, Medved, and Prager--REAL broadcasters. They will not want to listen to the guy with the funny glasses who is most famous for getting sued by a real broadcaster.

Another reason is the fact that Franken, and most hosts on Air America, will have co-hosts. In a nationally syndicated political show, I don't see this working. Is one going to be the straight-man? Will one do play-by-play while they other does color commentary? It's a recipe for disaster. If Franken wants to truly take on Rush mano-a-mano, he's going to have to man up and take the reigns himself.

Another thing that the network as a whole has working against them is that the big boys of radio, aren't being propped up by private investors who decide to make their own network for the sole purpose of spreading there agenda, then started plucking "celebrities" out of the air to host their shows. Limbaugh paid dues. Hanitty paid dues. They proved that they're shows were marketable, and then became well-funded shows. The minds behind Air America don't know what they are doing, they are launching a radio network with the intention to effect the upcoming election, not something many advertisers will be jumping on board for. Top that off with the fact that they've said they want to raise enough money to run for two years, even if they are unsuccessful--not exactly a way of selling yourself.

Now seriously, what is Air America thinking giving Chuck D a show? The creative mind behind such songs as "Son of a Bush" and the man who was only the ten-thousandth person to publicly repeat the "Bush, a Dick, and a Colon" joke. We are sure to hear some eloquent political commentary out of this show. Maybe when Chuck is on vacation they can get Flava Flav to fill in.

Good luck Franken. Good luck Garofolo. Good luck poor misguided souls of Air America.

Luke Duke 3/24/2004 12:52:00 PM #

Tuesday, March 23, 2004


A brief history that will help you see where I'm coming from on the following issue:

I was raised by a single mom. I come from a long line of bastards. My dad was a drug dealer. I grew up extremely poor. At one point I was homeless. If not for the kindness of Christian friends I would be in a far worse place than I am right now.

With that said; I am not of the school of thought that homosexuality is the biggest threat to our fine society. I think the larger threats are divorce, absentee dads, mothers who have kids they don't really want to take care of, and just plain bad parents. My heart goes out to single mothers, I have a soft spot in my heart for them, but I think, or at least I hope, we can all admit that it is not the preferred situation. The section of our population that I really have no sympathy for are the women who have babies that didn't ask to be born, but then treat them like a burden.

This is where a recent Washington Post article comes in.

A woman named Susan Douglas co-wrote a book called "The Mommy Myth: The Idealization of Motherhood and How It Has Undermined Women."

It's an exploration of what it means to be a mother in modern-day America and how, the authors conclude, the media (and right-wing politicians) have perverted motherhood into such a "psychological police state" that no mother could ever get it right, no matter what life choices she made.

"The standards just kept getting more and more ridiculous," Douglas says. "By the mid-90's, in addition to piping Mozart into our wombs, we had to drill [babies] with flashcards at nine months, and pretty soon we had to wear them for the first three years of their lives" -- in baby slings -- "oh, and we're supposed to look sexy while doing it!"

So being sexy is more important than being a mother, but the "right-wing politicians" are the ones that are diminishing the role of women in society.

I believe this woman's view of motherhood comes form a contempt for the majority of America and a contempt for common sense. She would like everyone to think that there is so much pressure on a woman to be a stay at home mom, and that anyone who touts that as the ideal situation is a bible thumping right-winger who can't form their own opinion and just repeats what they hear on "Focus on the Family," it's just not true. Many women in fact feel pressure to go out and get a job immediatly after the chord is cut.

So how is it that some women are made to feel that they are not a functioning member of society unless they have a career, some feel like they are under a tyranny of right-wing thinking and are judged if they don't stay home? I don't fully know the answer. Could be guilt, but either way it is pandering.

Pandering: To cater to the lower tastes and desires of others or exploit their weaknesses

...their core audience: the overworked, overstressed mom. ("Lock your kids in the basement, grab a glass of wine, put your feet up, and imagine this," they begin one chapter.)

So it is, by definition, pandering. Hold on, here come the money quotes.

"The notion that most women in America have such choices (whether to stay at home or not) is preposterous," Douglas says.

"For most mothers, work is an absolute necessity and so, hello, Earth to Congress, some reliable form of childcare is also an absolute necessity," the authors write. They go on to compare the United States to several Western European countries -- all of which provide more in terms of child care and paid parental leave time.

Aha! So now the true motivation is found. Free child-care for all. Higher taxes for all. Let me tell you, I've been in some bad day-cares, but I pity the kid who ends up at a federally run day-care. You know what the government does well? Government. What do they do very poorly? Charity, medical care, and just about anything else that doesn't fall under the umbrella of either legislation, judicial, and executive.

Day care can get pretty expensive, so what do you think it will cost in taxes when the government is running the show? Arizonans, can you imagine your children under the care of Janet Napolitano? There's no Cheerio shortage, your kids just eat to damn much. That is a very scary thought.

Bottom line: We have to stand-up for the rights of women, whatever they choose to do regarding their career. Women, my advice is stay away from magazines and books that try to sway your choice, after all it is your choice.

My mom was a young, single mother of four who worked full-time, went to school full-time, and still did a damn good job raising her kids. She sacrificed, paid for her own day-care and now is a business owner with a masters degree, working on her doctorate(of course the success comes right after I move out). Only in America...

Luke Duke 3/23/2004 01:28:00 PM #

Monday, March 22, 2004


Everyone's always talking about how they support our troops abroad, well now's your chance to show them your support in a tangible way.

Author Mike Whicker has started a program called "One Book For a G.I." that asks for donations of only $15 dollars that will help soldiers overseas buy much needed reading material.

Come on folks, it's only fifteen bucks. I know Bush's tax cuts got you at least that much.

Luke Duke 3/22/2004 06:45:00 PM #

Try to wrap your brain around this one. Sometimes I just can't understand the "logic" employed by those on the left.

Luke Duke 3/22/2004 02:29:00 PM #

There is something seriously wrong with these people.

Luke Duke 3/22/2004 12:22:00 PM #

Thursday, March 18, 2004


Continuing the fun that David from Infinite Monkeys started, here are some interesting campaign contributions:

Ross Perot: $2,000 Bush/Cheney

Barbra Streisand: $1,000 Dean
$1,000 Kerry
$1,000 Edwards
$1,000 Gephardt
$1,000 Sharpton
$1,000 Graham
$1,000 Clark

Tom Liddy(KFYI Talk Host/Son of G. Gordon): $1,800 Bush/Cheney

David Stern(NBA Commissioner): $2,000 Gephardt

Jerry Colangelo(Owner of Phoenix Suns): $2,000 Bush/Cheney

Donald Trump: $2,000 Bush/Cheney
$2,000 Kerry

George Soros: $2,000 Graham
$2,000 Kerry
$1,000 Dean

Russell Simmon(Hiph-Hop Mogul): $2,000 Sharpton

Don King: $2,000 Bush/Cheney
$2,000 Gephardt
$2,000 Moseley-Braun

Stephen King: $2,000 Dean

Sean "P Diddy" Combs: $2,000 Sharpton

Alec Baldwin: $2,000 Kerry

Billy Baldwin: $1,000 Dean

Rudy Boschwitz: $2,000 Bush/Cheney

Ralph Lauren: $2,000 Kerry

Candace Bergen: $1,500 Kerry

Chuck Norris: $2,000 Bush/Cheney

Nancy Pelosi: $2,000 Gephardt

Courtney Cox Arquette: $1,000 Gephardt

Ben Affleck: $2,000 Clark
$1,000 Kucinich

Ed Norton: $2,000 Kerry
$2,000 Kucinich

Susan Sarandon: $2,000 Dean

Marlo Thomas: $2,000 Gephardt

Martin Sheen: $2,000 Gephardt

Luke Duke 3/18/2004 06:39:00 PM #

Kerry Springer

Does any one else find it odd that Kerry speeches are started, finished and oft times interrupted by chants of "Kerry! Kerry! Kerry!"? It sounds strikingly similar to a chant that frequents another displeased democrat's television show.

I don' t pretend to fully understand what goes on in the mind of a liberal, try as I might, but what at a political event would bring you to the point of a foaming at the mouth chorus of "Kerry"s? At the Springer show it is the glorious sight of society's trash throwing flabby fists at each other in a clothes ripping free-for-all, but what's so great about a Kerry campaign stop?

If Ted Kennedy decided to make the sudden revelation to the crowd that he's "all that" and "you don't know, you don't know", while telling the crowd "look at you, you wish you had this jaw. Your mama likes it. Sit yo ass down", then I could understand a little jeering from the crowd. But not unless Carol Mosley-Braun dashed from back-stage to put a chair upside Teddy's head only to be stopped mid-flight by Ed Gillespie, would I launch into a full-fledged Kerry chant.

Who knows, it may only be a matter of time before we will be able to buy the uncensored versions of campaign stops on pay-per-view.

Luke Duke 3/18/2004 01:49:00 PM #

I'm not a very emotional guy, but articles like this always make me well-up.

"When my buddy died, it was the saddest day of my life," said Spc. Brian Belue. "But I know he died for a great cause and I know he was proud to give his life for his country."

"It's about time we got somebody in a key position to do what we need to do" in leading the military, said Sgt. Jerry Tucker, who served in Iraq.

These guys don't seem to mind Bush being a "deserter", and due to Kerry consistently turning his back on our soliders abroad I'm willing to bet the America's best will be voting red once again this year.

Luke Duke 3/18/2004 01:10:00 PM #

Okay seriously people, why is everybody going nuts about gas prices? Is it really that bad?

If it's really that big of a problem, get an extra job to make up for the extra ten bucks a month you're going to spend.

Luke Duke 3/18/2004 12:24:00 PM #

Wednesday, March 17, 2004


I'm not expecting a response but I sent the following e-mail to Mike Newcomb of Plugged-In in response to his latest post:

You have a couple thing wrong in your latest Plugged-In Post.

1. Somebody needs to explain the American electoral process to you because Al Gore did not have more electoral votes than Bush. Popular vote means nothing, so it's very intellectually dishonest to say Gore had more votes.

2. Bush did not say "You are either with us or against us", he in fact said (with proper context) ""Every nation and every region now has a decision to make, either you are with us, or you are with the terrorists." If you want to mantain any amount of credibility you will issue a correction, since you did use quotation marks in your blog.

3. I would like to challenge you to find one case where someone has beeen censored using the patriot act.

Just for the record, calling yourself "the real deal" and writing things like "the doctor is in the house!" make you sound like an idiot.


Luke Duke 3/17/2004 02:01:00 PM #

Welcome to the Big League

Everybody is always talking about what a dummy President Bush is, but what oratorical skills does John Kerry have.

"I actually did vote for the $87 billion, before I voted against it."

How can it be that this statement flies so far under the radar but when Bush mispronounces nuclear he's an idiot and a laughing-stock. At least you knew what Bush was talking about, I dare anyone to explain Kerry's statements to me.

Luke Duke 3/17/2004 01:57:00 PM #

Yet another misguided mind from Plugged-In is weighing-in on the the Spain bombing.

A determined people and their government can make the work of terrorists harder, but chest-beating about wiping out terrorism by force only invites challenge and more determined efforts by madmen ... men and women who may be more wrathful and determined to draw blood than they are insane.

Was it chest beating that caused 9-11? Maybe if we had tried to catch terrorists earlier, there would have been more planes, more death?

The most heroic event that took place on September 11th was the intentional crashing of the fourth plane in order to save countless others. The passengers on the plane that day stood up to terrorism and paid the greatest price to save others. But Earl de Berg thinks a strong stand against terror is the cause of terror.

The forty people on board flight 93 didn't have time to confer with the United Nations. They didn't have the luxury of making empty resolutions, and in my opinion neither did America.

But that's not what really makes me mad about the article. What really pisses me off is the fact that even now, as Arabs and Iraq citizens are being carried away in bags from another terrorist bomb site, even while Spain is still mourning their dead, what Earl de Berg is bitching about is patriotism. That's it. The world's problems boil down to American patriotism.

Who's fault is terror? Islamo-fascists? No, the blue collar worker with an American flag sticker on his 96 Cavalier. Cave-dwelling terrorist? No, the elected president of the freest country on Earth because his "flag-waving" (I've never actually seen the President waving a flag) apparently "only makes killers more determined". Well if you ask me, their killing should make us more determined.

Luke Duke 3/17/2004 11:20:00 AM #

Tuesday, March 16, 2004


According to liberal punk-rawkers Propaghandi, their Bush-bashing was silenced because they refused to take it easy on George Soros:

Well, guess which band got booted from [Rock Against Bush] because they refused to remove a pot-shot aimed at international billionaire, global financier, war-profiteer and all-around asswipe George Soros from their liner notes? No, it wasn't Good Charlotte. Good guess though. Try again.

That's right, it was us!

This just goes to show...ah, who cares what it goes to show I just don't like liberals.

(thanks to Conservative Punk)

Luke Duke 3/16/2004 05:56:00 PM #

Urban Outfitters is once again coming under fire. This time for "Dress Up Jesus", which allows you to dress Jesus up as the devil and as a woman. Yes, this is the same urban Outfitters that conspiracy theorists claimed to be a puppet for conservative politicians because they carried a shirt that said "voting is for old people". I guess there are some holes in that theory now.

Luke Duke 3/16/2004 03:17:00 PM #

I just noticed that Fraters has become the victor in their quest to save the reputation of Rudy Boschwitz.

Luke Duke 3/16/2004 02:38:00 PM #

Talk about backwards thinking:

Spain and its citizens ousted the conservative regime that thrust it headlong into a war that 90 percent of Spaniards did not want. This is a victory for democracy, a defeat for conservatism and a defeat for terrorism.

Under two conservative regimes, Aznar and Bush, both Spain and the United States have suffered the worst terrorist attacks in their history. It's clear the conservatives are losing the war on terror.

It's time to put those with real military and security credentials in office to successfully wage the war on terror, not individuals who couldn't even complete their national guard service.

The next step is to reclaim the goodwill of our allies that Bush has squandered. With Senator Kerry in office the healing will begin and the real war on terror will commence.

This was written by Mike Newcomb, a physician and the host of a show on the high-powered but extremely low rated KFNX, who contributes to the Republic's blog Plugged-In. If you like this gem try some of his others like These Guys Are Crooks, Indecent? How About Daddy, Boobs and Bozos, and last but maybe least, Yachtsman-in-chief. With such great work as this, I wonder why he has no ratings.

However, another valley physician (one I'd be a little more inclined to see), M. Zuhdi Jasser (an excellent bio), issues a scathing response:

Mike, my friend, I must take issue with your conclusions regarding the outcome of the recent elections in Spain. Your logic ignores the facts to amplify the liberal mantra against the war on Iraq.

The 'left' can selfishly blame the Bush administration's forward policy in Iraq or realize that the recent bombings in Karbala, Baghdad and Madrid are a sign that we are getting closer to their jugular.

Please, read the whole thing.

Luke Duke 3/16/2004 02:22:00 PM #

Take the newest Fraters poll.

For the record my vote was music.

Luke Duke 3/16/2004 12:25:00 PM #

Monday, March 15, 2004


John Kerry gives me a headache.

Luke Duke 3/15/2004 02:42:00 PM #

Friday, March 12, 2004


One of These Things is Not Like the Other


Hugh Hewitt, Ken Tamplin, and Coolio.

UPDATE: I just heard Hugh "Double Hizzle" Hewitt trashing rap on air.

Luke Duke 3/12/2004 04:03:00 PM #

I think the media is a little off calling the marches in Spain "protests". Maybe if they said protesting terrorism, but it would seem much more representative of the vibe if they called it marching in support of Spain.

Luke Duke 3/12/2004 03:31:00 PM #

It's a sad world when hearing of a massive terrorist attack I'm no longer surprised. I could have easily glanced over the news and went on with my life, but not with the memories of September 11th in my head.

If someone would have told me on the 12th of September in 2001 that we would go this long without a terrorist attack on our soil I wouldn't have believed it for a second. I think back to all the doomsday, WW3 talk. I remember the commentators on the news prognosticating on a new world where entertainment would be different, one even saying that "reality shows will disappear because we are living the ultimate realty." Everyone knew our lives would change, the only thing left to guess was how much.

But how much have things changed? How do you make yourself remember the feelings you want so hard to forget? I don't think my life has changed enough. I don't think the world has changed enough.

The day after 200 innocent civilians died in a viscous attack, millions woke up to pain, rubbing their eyes, then, like a punch to the gut remembered that yesterday really did happen. However, millions woke up to hear Howard Stern's silent protest of "censorship". How much has really changed?

Read Lileks.

Luke Duke 3/12/2004 12:17:00 PM #

I tried listening to a little Howard Stern today, but it has become completely un-listenable.

Poor little Howard, he's such a martyr. I'm so glad he is there to protect my freedoms. "I know I threaten this all the time guys, but I might really quit this time. That'll show the world!"

If he is such a freedom fighter then why does he always sound like such a whiny little bitch?

Luke Duke 3/12/2004 11:39:00 AM #

Thursday, March 11, 2004


Something you don't see in the Republic very often, a very good article. Props to Robert Robb (despite the Hugh Hewitt-esqe annoying name).

In her veto of legislation providing a waiting period and informed consent before an abortion, Gov. Janet Napolitano has again revealed herself as a cultural leftist, and a fairly extreme one at that.

Luke Duke 3/11/2004 02:30:00 PM #

Tim Robbins may have just created the dumbest play ever.

Luke Duke 3/11/2004 02:19:00 PM #

Wednesday, March 10, 2004


Calling All Idiots

Last month I wrote about Janet Napolitano's plan to implement a state-wide 211 phone number to help connect volunteers to the less fortunate and to keep people up to date on homeland security concerns (I can just see all the paranoid schizophrenics putting this on speed-dial and calling as many times as their day will let them).

Well now there is a web-site with all the information you need on the local 2-1-1 system Napolitano wants to introduce. From the looks of the site, I would guess that by putting together a "Governor's counsel" to investigate the matter, is just going through the motions. The counsel could determine that baby seals were being killed by the 2-1-1 number and Napolitano would still run with the idea. Arizona, kiss your homeland security budget good-bye. I guess we'll probably have to arm our law enforcement with telephones so in the case of a terrorist attack they can secure any area with the touch of three little buttons. If that doesn't work, I'm sure the number will help us locate of the body parts of our dead.

So, with the new number all but set in stone, I'm going to be the first with the 2-1-1 slang. When your playing a pick-up game at the park on a Saturday and you want to ask your friends what's up with homeland security, volunteer work, fire evacuations, non-emergency needs, or disaster relief, you just say, "Yo! What's the 2-1-1?" I think this could catch on.

Luke Duke 3/10/2004 02:37:00 PM #

Tuesday, March 09, 2004


While doing a little research to further my case against Janet Napolitano's existence, I found a web-site that describes her as being a dead-center moderate. "" even gives this little graphic to help:

Now contrast that to my observations on Janet Napolitano's veto of a very popular bill last week, and you will see that I am obviously insane, and Janet Napolitano is in fact a moderate.

Luke Duke 3/09/2004 05:30:00 PM #

I would like to introduce to all of you, O. Ricardo Pimental, a one topic (immigration) author and one of the worst apologists ever.

Luke Duke 3/09/2004 05:12:00 PM #

Someone stumbled upon this site while searching for '"Janet Napolitano" girlfriend'. I guess I'm not the only one with questions.

Luke Duke 3/09/2004 03:45:00 PM #

Pot Calling the Kettle Black in a Glass House

In the latest mass e-mass mailing from the "team" takes Secretary of Education Rod Paige to task for calling America's largest teachers union a "terrorist organization", IN JEST. Coming from the same crowd that gives angry, pretentious ass-holes (I'm not insulting they're patriotism) a medium to spew hatred and compare President Bush to Hitler? You've gotta be kidding.

They, go on to use the same tired rhetoric against this administration that we've been hearing for well over a year and a half now.

...when people dare to disagree with its policies, it questions their patriotism or labels them terrorists.

You know what's worse than calling someone un-patriotic? Pandering to patriotism. Every speech I hear where the liberal on stage plays the victim of the meanie Bush administration that calls them un-patriotic when all they want to do is save the world, makes me want to whip out the violin and join in the party-wide pity party.

Okay, get your safety goggles on, the glass house is about to come shattering down.

We teach our kids that name calling is not the right way to win an argument - in fact, it’s usually a sign that you don't have the facts on your side. Making our schools better is a tough job. We need a Secretary of Education who sees teachers and their representatives as partners in this effort rather than as enemies. Join us in calling on President Bush to find a better person for the job.

Yep, there it is in #666666 and white. This is perhaps the most hypocritical thing they've sent me since I signed up to their organization under the alias "William J Clinton". I don't know what kind of pansy parents these people had, but my mom taught me to stand my ground and win an argument by any means necessary, as long as you tell the truth. Name-calling hurts the most when it's true.

Luke Duke 3/09/2004 03:14:00 PM #

I broke down and joined a gym over this last weekend. I went into the place knowing fully that I was going to sign up for a membership, but I wanted them to sell it to me anyway. I have to say I was quite disappointed.

The guy tried really hard, but I just don't think he had a salesman bone in his body. Afraid of turning into a wuss like this guy, I thought for a minute about walking out and finding a real gym, but because this one is so close to my house I really had no choice but to join.

So, the guy got his commission, and I got my gym membership, but I still feel like something is missing. What kind of world do we live in that you can't even count on a good high-pressure sale when you go to check out a gym?

Luke Duke 3/09/2004 10:50:00 AM #

Monday, March 08, 2004


It was 91 in Phoenix today. Mother Nature's getting ready to punish me for the bragging I did this winter.

Luke Duke 3/08/2004 06:55:00 PM #

Mondays suck.

Luke Duke 3/08/2004 03:19:00 PM #

Friday, March 05, 2004


A recent Fraters post made me think of a new "Seperated at Birth".

The Joker's jester friend

The Joker himself

Luke Duke 3/05/2004 07:06:00 PM #

Those Wacky Bin Ladens

A new Canadian documentary is portraying Osama Bin Laden as a family man.

From SF Gate:

Osama bin Laden likes poetry and volleyball, had squabbles with his children, and banned any American conveniences like ice and soft drinks, according to a Canadian TV documentary on a family that had close ties to the al-Qaida leader until 2001.

I would hardly call ice an "American convenience". Last time I checked there was ice in a lot of places.

The program showed a softer side of the world's No. 1 fugitive, but it also reflected his fundamentalist Islamic attitudes toward women and his terrorist war against the United States.

That's good, there's balance. I'm deeply offended whenever the American press portrays Osama Bin Laden as a murdering fundamentalist without once mentioning his love of poetry and his Precious Moments statuette collection. Isn't there something we can do about Canada. Every time I read about something insanely stupid in the news I can bet it is coming from either Canada or Germany. This documentary is just the latest in a long list of incredibly stupid yet insignificant things that Canadians have done.

"He has issues with his wife and he has issues with his kids. Financial issues, you know. The kids aren't listening, the kids aren't doing this and that," Khadr said

I think I see a sitcom on the horizon.

Luke Duke 3/05/2004 02:49:00 PM #

Spike TV is launching a "conservative" cartoon. Sounds pretty good, but I wonder if it will be following Stripperella or Howard Stern the High School Years?

Save Rudy Boschwitz.

Luke Duke 3/05/2004 01:51:00 PM #

Thursday, March 04, 2004


Right now I am pissed. At Janet Napolitano, at the Arizona Republic and most of all the lobbyists for Planned Parenthood.

Today, despite receiving thousands of calls and letter in favor of it, Janet Napolitano vetoed the informed consent bill that would allow abortion patients to receive information on the procedure, instead of having a major medical treatment with almost no education on the issue and usually without meeting the doctor.

From the Republic:

Following through on her campaign promise to protect abortion rights, Gov. Janet Napolitano vetoed a proposal Thursday to impose a 24-hour waiting period for women who want the procedure

You see that? Her campaign promise to protect abortion rights not women's rights. It might as well say Planned Parenthood's right to exploit young women. And make no mistake, they are exploiting women, mostly the poor and minorities that the liberals profess to be protecting.

Who doesn't think that McDonald's are exploiting Americans? Who thinks that "big tobacco" isn't exploiting people? Then you have to believe that abortion companies are exploiting women. The same way that McDonald's didn't want to give nutritional information, the same way that cigarette companies didn't want a surgeon general's warning, Planned Parenthood doesn't want patients to have information on the harms of abortion. Ant there is harm.

The informed consent bill wasn't killed today, it was dead the moment Napolitano was sworn into office. She's made it clear that "campaign promises" are more important than the will of her constituents and the representatives they elect. Even if I die trying, I will do anything I can to remove Janet Napolitano from office.

If you are interested in more information go to the Center for AZ Policy.

Luke Duke 3/04/2004 05:28:00 PM #

As you can tell by my previous post I have nothing interesting to say. So here's an equally un-interesting review of an un-interesting book.

The Brethren-by John Grisham

I've always thought John Grisham to be over-rated, but I keep trying, hoping that I'll see what draws millions of readers to him. This book is a couple of years old, and revolves around a presidential election, and a scam being run from inside of a prison. The plot drags, and you can see the twists coming from a mile away. This will be a simple review (Puzzlestud is a kinda simple place), don't waste your time.

Luke Duke 3/04/2004 03:32:00 PM #

I went to Wendy's for one of their new salads today, and when I was through paying the nice lady behind the counter told me to "have a wonderful day". This made me think. I have no problem with the lady telling me to have a good day, or even a nice day. Who wouldn't want to have a good day? But a wonderful day?

I guess it all depends on whether you like wondering. I myself like surprises, unless I know a surprise is coming, then I drive myself crazy wondering what it is.

I also have to wonder if the cashier really cares if my day was full of wonder. I'm sure she wants me to have an okay day, but I don't think she's going to lose any sleep tonight if she finds I haven't done a sufficient amount of wondering.

I guess she got her wish, here I am wondering about what the hell "have a wonderful day" is supposed to mean.

Luke Duke 3/04/2004 03:19:00 PM #

Okay, this whole linking to save Rudy Boschwitz thing isn't working very well.

Fraters is still sitting on page 13 in the Google search. I however, am #1 on page 6.

Luke Duke 3/04/2004 02:12:00 PM #

News From up North

Always interesting, here is the latest from Canada, eh.

For the next six months, the province's Department of Health and the CMHA's provincial branch want readers and viewers to monitor their local newspapers and television stations and report any uses of "inappropriate" words such as "basket case," "lunatic," "nutcase," "fruitcake," "madman" and "kooky" to authorities in return for "cash prizes."

Luke Duke 3/04/2004 12:40:00 PM #

Wednesday, March 03, 2004


Brad at Infinite Monkeys jumps on the Napolitano love train, and even gives some history on the gas shortage(stop filling your tanks you damn topper-offers!).

Luke Duke 3/03/2004 12:49:00 PM #

Those of you closely following the ongoing battle to defend the honor of Rudy Boshwitz may have already noticed the backwards progress. Fraters used to be on google page 12 when searching for Rudy Boschwitz, now they are at 13.

Luke Duke 3/03/2004 12:40:00 PM #

I'd like to dedicate a little time to the more unfortunate in our society today, the poor and disenfranchised among us. Orphans? No. Homeless? Nope. The terminally ill? Not today. Today we here ate Puzzlestud look to help out the criminals in our fair country.

From the Seattle Times:

"Quite frankly, when we started, a lot of people said this isn't something we should do, felons shouldn't have the right to vote, but the more we thought about the cause of felony disenfranchisement — that the criminal-justice system is biased against African Americans — you realize this is a really important issue. ... They're not fully participating in society, and they're forever second-class citizens."

Next, we go to The Southern Digest, where the disgusting racism behind the game of chess is exposed.

Everyone knows that in a chess game white moves first.

This abstractly implies that white has a distinct advantage over black because black has to always take a defensive stand. Some see this as a continuing form of racism and want to change the rules of the game. Bill Ware, a devoted chess player, is one of these people and has come up with a new form of chess.

"Abstractly implies"? Abstractly indeed.

To finish off the list of suffering souls, we highlight those whose self-confidence is demolished by those dorky honor roll kids.


There are several problems with honor rolls. One is that whenever you crown a winner, by implication you designate a roomful of also-rans.

Stop the world God, I want to get off.

Humanity can redeem itself by saving Rudy Boschwitz.

Luke Duke 3/03/2004 12:34:00 PM #

Tuesday, March 02, 2004


...A Healthy Part of a McBalanced Diet

The Associated Press is reporting that McDonald's will be "phasing out it's Supersized products.

The move comes as the world's largest restaurant company, and fast-food chains in general, are under growing public pressure to give consumers healthier food options in a nation that has suddenly become aware of its bulging waistline and the resulting health dangers

I attribute this directly to the report my girlfriend did on the un-healthy marketing plan, and the history of up-sizing's effect on profit and obesity. A little far-fetched maybe seeing as it was a college paper only read by a small crowd, and books such as Fat Land have documented the topics more thoroughly, but hey she's my girlfriend so I've gotta give her credit.

Luke Duke 3/02/2004 06:34:00 PM #

Fraters may be on the twelth page in a Google search for Rudy Boschwitz, but in Yahoo! they are on a respectable page four.

Luke Duke 3/02/2004 01:37:00 PM #

What Media Bias

The Republic, once again showing how balanced it is(not very), ran a ridiculous article yesterday, calling Janet Napolitano intelligent of all things. You have to love this lead:

In slightly more than a year, a mix of intelligence, toughness and persistence has propelled Arizona Gov. Janet Napolitano to the top tier of the national Democratic Party.

Meanwhile, gas prices are still skyrocketing, and are well above the national average, despite Napolitano's tough talk following the gas crisis this summer. I've never even heard results from the committe that she had investigating the shortage. Come to think of it, I've only heard results from one of her many committes, and I'm sure it was tough to decide CPS needed more money.

"Boy, she is tough and smart as a whip," said Michigan Gov. Jennifer Granholm, herself a rising star in Democratic circles. "She's got a great sense of humor. She is a leader on national issues. If I'm going into battle, I definitely want Janet Napolitano on my side."

I have never seen this "humor" Gov. Granholm speeks of, but I'll take her word for it. As far as going to battle with Napolitano, only if it was a bar-brawl.

The article goes on to mention how critisism is coming from republicans, but they lead you to think that the preise for Napolitano isn't partisan at all. It states her intelligence and toughness as fact, but presents her faults as republican slander.

I hope she is chosen as Kerry's running-mate, because I belive nothing would sink a campaing faster than this.

Oh yeah, save Rudy Boschwitz

Luke Duke 3/02/2004 12:45:00 PM #

Monday, March 01, 2004


The Smoking Gun has posted some complaints sent to the FCC following Janet Jackson's over-exposure at the Super Bowl last month. Of course they picked the most un-intelligible(and funniest!), but the letters supporting Janet's right to flop that thing out are hilarious(all from members no doubt).

My favorite sentence:

"Go to hell you Nazi government daughter of an illigitimate(sic) street walking hooker from hell!"

Luke Duke 3/01/2004 06:08:00 PM #

Okay the numbers are in, and Ben from Infinite Monkeys is the clear winner of the Passion Pool with "more money than God".

Stop by the Esplanade any time between 9 and 5 to receive your free tape of the Hugh Hewitt show with Mark Larson guest hosting.

Luke Duke 3/01/2004 11:56:00 AM #
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